I’m now living in an apartment, have a part-time job in retail, lioness is still out driving. Both of our kitties are with Me. Don’t have a car (yet), but My job is within walking distance.
But something… big has happened, to both Myself and to My lioness. We had been talking about the fact that we think we (our souls) are a lot older than our current ages, like we keep getting reincarnated, so we can be with each other here on Earth. I have always been mildly empathic, and it is getting stronger. lioness has had Shamanistic tenancies, such as dreams coming true, talking with spirits (human and animal), healing, etc. We both have had flashbacks to things our current selves have not experienced; previous life flashbacks. Some of them are the same. For example I get flashes of standing on the Scottish Moors, and playing violin in a tavern. lioness has had flashes of being in a tavern in Scotland, watching a blonde woman she felt a strong connection to playing the violin. Also, I’ve always loved to play fiddle/Celtic music, and a lot of the time My instructor would pick out a random song from the book, and I could play it with hardly any issues. In fact, of biggest and deepest discussion happened right before the ”something big” happened. That morning, actually.
On Christmas Eve, we went out for drinks with a co-worker (Noah) of mine and his friend (Cory). While at the bar, something happened to lioness. she touched Cory’s arm, and something in her changed. her voice dropped in pitch, and became… guttural. She kept saying something like “A thousand deaths and a million screams”. She didn’t know if that was the past, or coming in the future. Noah took us back to his place to ”calm us down”. We did what he called a prayer circle. I was South, lioness was North. I was holding a white quartz crystal. I don’t remember what lioness was holding, other than it was a black stone. There were 12 brown jade balls with the animals of the Chinese Zodiac around us; I was holding the Dragon, lioness the Rat. Noah was West, Cory was East. There was a candelabra in the middle of our circle with 5 while candles.
I’ve had 4 drinks before and been fine. but that night, I get light-headed, dizzy, and very out of it, as if I was drunk, but like I said, I’ve had that many drinks before with no issues. Same with lioness.
I remember lioness talking, but not very clearly what. She was chanting I think, and was one by one putting the candles out with her bare hand.
I remember asking what I could do to save My pack, and was told I couldn’t.
I remember lioness repeating the ”a thousand deaths and a million screams”
I remember right after we broke the circle, there was something in the apartment with us.
I remember being so scared, and confused, and getting overloaded from lioness’ emotions through our Soulbond, and taking a pushtack and repeatedly scratching Myself to calm down
I remember lioness being upset, not herself, still talking not like herself.
I know there are many things that I don’t remember. We finally got lioness into the car and Noah drove us home.
We were so drained the next day ( I was very sick during the night), we both were ill the following morning. Felt spacey, out of it, drained, sick, empty, hollow, afraid, hopeless…
lioness was having powerful, frightening, stressful dreams for a few nights afterward, but they have calmed down a lot and are not as frequent. The Spirits realized how much stress and hurt it was putting on her, I think. Or they’re talking turns, I don’t know.
I’m not sure what happened that night. If, since the location of the bar we went to is downtown, where there are a lot of old Indian Mounds, plus being across the street from the location of a now-gone church were Native Americans were converted, and those who refused were killed, if they started something.
If Noah and/or Cory did something (waking our gifts, psychic vampirism, forming a circle to take our psychic energy for themselves or someone else, or something different entirely.)
Or something else. I do know that they had something to do with it, whether it was what they intended or not, whether they knew this was going to happen or not, wanted this to happen or not, working for themselves or someone else (good or otherwise). I don’t know. I wish I did. But Noah refuses to be honest with Me. I try and get a read on him and I hit a blank wall, a black hole that I can’t get through yet.
However this all happened, I do know that it really opened up lioness and Myself to our gifts, our pasts, our futures, and our roles in it all.
lioness is studying Shamanism, as she is part Cherokee. The spirits are helping her, as well as the Totems, Mother Earth, etc., as well as our Soulbond, our mate connection. Also white witchcraft.
I am working on developing My Empathic abilities, with her and others (human and animal). Crystals help Me a lot. considering looking into Dowsing, but only after I have a better grip on My other gifts. I am also starting to learn white witchcraft. I did My first cleansing spell using fire, water and sunlight to cleanse My new Protection amulet. I could feel the difference afterwards so am happy about that.
I have had a couple of dreams, and instances with ghosts since our awakening.
In My first dream I was trapped in a prison, I knew I had been there before. My cell was guarded by a wolf-like creature that moved on its rear legs and had horns like a ram. This time, it was a different one that previously guarded Me. The old one had been nice, this one wasn’t.
The Second one, I was in this huge ‘prison camp’ for people like Me, with gifts. it was winter. the building was like one huge, modernized castle. there was no way to escape, and death was given to those who tried, but still, I was trying to figure out how to get out. I remember being outside, in the sun, on a frozen lake, having a snowball fight with some of the others when a fellow male captive jumped from up really high. he splattered all over the ice really close to Me, blood was everywhere.
The third dream, I was on Earth, going towards a huge gold/brick building with someone else. I had been here too, I remember. while they went inside, I wandered around outside. There were other, smaller buildings. It was early winter I think. Gray, gloomy, damp. No snow. I was near one of the smaller out buildings when I saw another car driving up. I don’t know (or don’t remember) who or what it was/from, but I knew it was bad and I had to get out of there. So I hid in the building, and went building to building trying to get off of the property while being pursued.
I haven’t had any more of these… vivid dreams where I know they’re real even though I’m dreaming.
lioness had Me sit down at our house and focus on a stone bead, and tell her what I felt. I was focused on the stone, but was sensing a spirit. It was old, and sad, but also calm, being here.
Twice at work I’ve had rescent run-ins with our local ghost (over half of the staff has had stuff happen near/to them so I’m not the only one he’s contacted/done stuff to). The first major one was I was on a 4 foot ladder, had been up there awhile so it wasn’t Me getting dizzy. Suddenly something cool hit My chest, and the cool feeling went down My arms, to My stomach and to My head. at the same time My upper body, from the waist up, whipped backwards, snapping My head, and My vision went white, and I very faintly got the impression of ‘fun’ emotion, like going down a huge slide. Later I looked up colors and found that white is typically a good thing. The fact that it happened by the wooden shelving units, that are safe to grab unto for balance, makes Me think he was pulling a prank, letting Me know he’s there.
The very next day, I was sitting in the break room and for no reason a plastic bin that was on another table suddenly fell off onto the floor.
We are learning, as much as we can. I’m having a hard time finding resources for strengthening My empathic gift, and am not too sure about book buying without being able to see them first. So anyone who is reading this, if you have any suggestions for Me, or for My lioness, please say so.